By Ricky F. Lo
Funfare, Entertainment Section,
The Philippine Star February 17, 2011
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Why is it harder for celebrities to keep relationships strong than non-celebrities?
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The show biz environment is like one big pick-up joint. Since most everyone in show biz is beautiful and handsome, there is a natural temptation to get attracted to and lust after someone more physically attractive than one’s current partner.
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Secondly, many female celebs get a kick out of being temptresses and seductresses, while many male celebs are certified philanderers or “players.” When by chance these people meet, they seize the opportunity to enjoy the chemistry.
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Thirdly, the culture of the entertainment industry does not promote fidelity in relationships. Rumors of break-ups, stormy relationships, and exposes of infidelity are staple news in gossip shows. Sometimes in fact, gossip is intentionally created to destabilize an otherwise harmonious showbiz couple.
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Fourthly, show biz treats people like commodities with a short shelf-life. Once the show biz artist is older, he or she is quickly replaced by younger, fresher, and more attractive ones. Sometimes, this attitude of disposability is applied to relationships. When the partner is not considered attractive anymore, the quick option is to dispose and replace.
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What should the celebrity spouse do to keep the relationship intact? What if the other spouse is a non-show biz?
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Whether it is a show biz couple or not, the success of any relationship is based on 5 essential ingredients: compatibility, commitment, communication, collaboration, and connectedness.
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When one or more of these ingredients is missing, the relationship becomes a shaky one. When only one of the partners is willing to work at the relationship, then it is essentially a non-relationship.
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It doesn’t matter that one partner is show biz and the other is not. Most working couples do not have the same job anyway. What matters most is that each partner stays faithful by dispelling thoughts of playing around and by running away from temptation.
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How come some celebrity wives stay faithful to their husbands or keep quiet even if their celebrity husband is playing around?
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The common reason why wives stay faithful to their philandering husband is to keep the family intact for the children’s sake.
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Many wives also stay because they are financially-dependent on their husband.
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Another reason is that some wives subconsciously enjoy playing the role of “mother-teacher” to their immature and adolescent-minded husband.
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And lastly, some wives harbour the hope that if they just remain faithful, their husbands will eventually see the light and reform from their philandering ways.
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Why do male celebrities who were known playboys when they were single start to behave when they're married? e.g. Richard Gomez, Dolphy, who's as good as married to Zsa Zsa
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Biologically, testosterone production in men decreases as they age. With reduced testosterone levels, the sexual drive and sexual aggression also decreases.
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Psychologically, priorities and values change as men age. Young adult men are more concerned on catching an ideal mate. Men in midlife focus on family-building and career development. And elderly men focus on getting medical treatment for their illnesses, as well as leaving a legacy behind.
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Why do philandering married male celebrities choose to return to their respective wives even if they still play around? They even swear everlasting love to their wife.
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Love does not ensure monogamy. A man is capable of sincerely loving two or more women simultaneously. Some religions recognize this hence polygamy is allowed.
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Some men treat their wives more like mother figures, that is, someone to come home who will take care of them after they’ve finished romping around with their playmates.
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Finally, many men just use other women as outlets for their sexual release, but they remain emotionally loyal to their wives.
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