Friday, November 27, 2009

... counseling for transgendered, transexual, and gender-variant persons in the philippines ... (life coach, psychotherapist, psychiatrist)

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i met sharon for a counseling session this afternoon and she told me her story.
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as a kid growing up, she didn't have much care in the world. but as soon as puberty hit her, she fell into a deep crisis about her sexual identity. she became severely disturbed by the mismatch between her masculine mentality and her feminine appearance. for her, nature had played a dirty trick on her by making her a "man trapped in a woman's body."
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in order to halt the development of female sexual characteristics, she resorted to extreme dieting which made her frail and sickly in the process. years later, as she researched on the internet, she discovered that what she considered as her "affliction" had a name-- it was a condition known as "transexuality."
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this afternoon, sharon sought consultation with me for the very reason that she was ready to come to terms with her transexual self. she was ready to let go of the emotional baggage that had burdened her through the years.
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through individual counseling and group therapy with other transexuals, i hope to assist her well in her journey towards personal healing, growth, and wholeness.
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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

... maintaining long distance relationships ...

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just did an interview for the TFC program "kwentong disyerto." the topic was on maintaining relationships across the miles. the crew was a friendly bunch and because of their apparent dedication to helping filipino migrant workers and their families, this brief interview was all the more engaging to do.
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first of all, i stressed in the interview the fact that couples separated by long distance are vulnerable to a number of problems which include loneliness, depression, and suicidal thoughts; jealousy and insecurity; infidelity; lessening intimacy; quarrels and conflicts.
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given these risks, it is important for couples to keep their emotional intimacy burning and to stay committed and faithful to the relationship.
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there wasn't time to give a lot of tips but these were what i mentioned: (1) frequency of communication is as important as the quality of interaction. (2) some forms of communication douse cold water on the warmth of a relationship. couples should minimize or avoid nagging, criticism, accusation, put-downs, shouting, demanding behavior, mind games, and guilt tripping. (3) couples should express a lot of encouragement and appreciation to each other. (4) couples should keep each other updated through blog journals, virtual (on-cam) visitations, handwritten letters, hand-made cards, videos and audio recordings. (5) avoid sharing problems to the opposite sex lest an affair develops. (6) and finally, it will be helpful for each partner to have a support and accountability group which monitors for unfaithful behavior, among other things.
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here i am counseling OFW juancho on his long distance relationship.
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Juancho seems to be absorbing everything i say with focused intent and concentrated effort.
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yes, it just seems.
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