... adjusting to new school ... (life coach, counselor, psychotherapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, philippines)

Adjusting to new school

What are the sources of stress for the child and the parent when the kid transfers to a new school?

Human beings are creatures of comfort. So when transitions and changes come along, it is only natural to get stressed. This applies to children as well as adults.

When children transfer to a new school, there is always a fear of the unknown. Since a new school is unfamiliar territory, the child wonders whether the teachers are strict, whether the subjects are difficult, and whether he can blend in with new classmates.

Another stress new transferees have is in getting separated from friends and classmates from the previous school. There may be some sort of separation anxiety, loneliness, and a sense of alienation in the first days of being in a new school.

Also, if the reason for the transfer is a conduct problem from the previous school, the child wonders whether people in the new school will ever find out.

As for the parents, their anxieties primarily center around whether their child will adjust smoothly and integrate well in the new school- its system, its teachers, and the new classmates their child will have.

What should the parent do? Should he stay in school for the first few days to help the child adjust? If so, for how long? . What should the parent tell the child and his teacher?

Months before it actually happens, the parents must prepare the child for the transfer. Parents can open up the topic with the child and discuss the reasons why the transfer must be done. The parents can also give the child options for which school he could transfer, thus empowering the child to make his or her choice. Visits can be done to prospective schools so that the child gets a feel of its environment. Lastly, a generous dose of encouragement and emotional support should be given to the child before, during, and after the transition takes place.

If needed, and if school policies allow, parents of young anxious children can accompany them for a few days just so that the child does not feel alone, lonely, or lost. Slowly, the parent weans away as the child develops friendships among his or her classmates.

Both parents and teachers can strategize on how to get the child integrated in the new school. For instance, other children can be assigned to befriend and accompany their new classmate. Also, the child can asked to join enjoyable activities which build confidence and promote friendships.

Around how long will it take a child to adjust to his new school?

Every child is different in the way he or she adjusts to transitions. Some will have no difficulties in adjusting, while others will take months to feel comfortable in the new environment. To be on the safe side, it is best to monitor the child for symptoms of anxiety and depression. This may manifest as changes in motivation, mood, behaviour, and health.