Psychologist says Chito and Neri can survive scandal
By Maridol Rañoa-Bismark | Yahoo! Southeast Asia Newsroom – 18 hours ago
You must be hiding under a rock if you haven't heard of the video that has laid bare Parokya ni Edgar frontman Chito Miranda and grilfriend Neri naig's most intimate moments. The video has been the subject of many articles and discussions among netizens.
Chito has spoken up, not only in defense of Neri, but of their relationship.
“Hindi ninyo kami matitinag,” he told the person who he thinks ‘stole’ the hard drive bearing the video.
But what’s been done is done. The damage is there. The question is, how will Chito and Neri move on?
Psychologist and life coach Dr. Randy Dellosa has good news for the beleaguered couple.
“Their respective careers will only get damaged if they allow it to happen. Chito and Neri have to remember that many other celebrities have had their share of scandals and controversies and most were successfully able to rise above them. In fact, all they need to do is just wait for the next celebrity scandal to catch the public’s attention before the focus on them fades.”
Dellosa adds that Chito and Neri can actually turn the tide in their favor.
“Since the spotlight is on them, Chito and Neri should actually take it as an opportunity to advance in their respective careers. Chito should continue creating more songs to add to his legacy as a musician, and Neri should continue improving her craft as an artist. If they are able to get people awed by their talent and artistic contributions, the impact of the scandal will just fade from the public’s consciousness. “
Sadly, however, the much of the burden lies on Neri’s shoulders. Dellosa notes that women “are quickly likened to prostitutes and are easily judged as having loose morals, lack of breeding, or a dysfunctional childhood.”
Double standard
The double standard still persists, he observes. Men may be outwardly castigated for their sexual indiscretions but they are also secretly admired and envied by other men for their sexual prowess.
Dellosa also finds it interesting that the very people who lash out on Chito and Neri are the ones who eagerly scrutinize the sex video. Instead of ignoring the video, these holier-than-thous spend a lot of time taking it all in.
More public scrutiny, however, is the last thing Chito and Neri need at this crisis point in their lives. What they need, states Dellosa, is compassion and encouragement.
And, contrary to what Chito thinks, he need not defend Neri as a victim of the scandal.
“Perhaps their best course of action is to keep mum about the issue until it dies a natural death,” states Dellosa.
Marriage at this point is out of the question, since it just might worsen the problem.
“It is never good to decide on marriage during a period of crisis. An ‘accident’ should not be corrected with a ‘mistake.’ In Chito and Neri’s case, the video leakage will not be rectified by a rash decision to get married,” the psychologist explains.
Besides, he adds, this will not lessen the embarrassment and shame the leaked video has created.
Lesson learned
As they say in showbiz – and this holds true in other fields as well – the impact of Chito and Neri’s sex scandal will fade once a new controversy erupts. The couple is now in the eye of the storm because no bigger showbiz issue has cropped up.
Until then, Chito and Neri should hold on, let the storm pass, and learn their lesson. They should remember that guarding their privacy at all costs could spare them a lot of sleepless nights and negative posts in theirs – and others’ – social media accounts.
It’s a costly lesson, but it’s something they can profit a lot from.
By Maridol Rañoa-Bismark | Yahoo! Southeast Asia Newsroom – 18 hours ago
You must be hiding under a rock if you haven't heard of the video that has laid bare Parokya ni Edgar frontman Chito Miranda and grilfriend Neri naig's most intimate moments. The video has been the subject of many articles and discussions among netizens.
Chito has spoken up, not only in defense of Neri, but of their relationship.
“Hindi ninyo kami matitinag,” he told the person who he thinks ‘stole’ the hard drive bearing the video.
But what’s been done is done. The damage is there. The question is, how will Chito and Neri move on?
Psychologist and life coach Dr. Randy Dellosa has good news for the beleaguered couple.
“Their respective careers will only get damaged if they allow it to happen. Chito and Neri have to remember that many other celebrities have had their share of scandals and controversies and most were successfully able to rise above them. In fact, all they need to do is just wait for the next celebrity scandal to catch the public’s attention before the focus on them fades.”
Dellosa adds that Chito and Neri can actually turn the tide in their favor.
“Since the spotlight is on them, Chito and Neri should actually take it as an opportunity to advance in their respective careers. Chito should continue creating more songs to add to his legacy as a musician, and Neri should continue improving her craft as an artist. If they are able to get people awed by their talent and artistic contributions, the impact of the scandal will just fade from the public’s consciousness. “
Sadly, however, the much of the burden lies on Neri’s shoulders. Dellosa notes that women “are quickly likened to prostitutes and are easily judged as having loose morals, lack of breeding, or a dysfunctional childhood.”
The double standard still persists, he observes. Men may be outwardly castigated for their sexual indiscretions but they are also secretly admired and envied by other men for their sexual prowess.
Dellosa also finds it interesting that the very people who lash out on Chito and Neri are the ones who eagerly scrutinize the sex video. Instead of ignoring the video, these holier-than-thous spend a lot of time taking it all in.
More public scrutiny, however, is the last thing Chito and Neri need at this crisis point in their lives. What they need, states Dellosa, is compassion and encouragement.
And, contrary to what Chito thinks, he need not defend Neri as a victim of the scandal.
“Perhaps their best course of action is to keep mum about the issue until it dies a natural death,” states Dellosa.
Marriage at this point is out of the question, since it just might worsen the problem.
“It is never good to decide on marriage during a period of crisis. An ‘accident’ should not be corrected with a ‘mistake.’ In Chito and Neri’s case, the video leakage will not be rectified by a rash decision to get married,” the psychologist explains.
Besides, he adds, this will not lessen the embarrassment and shame the leaked video has created.
Lesson learned
As they say in showbiz – and this holds true in other fields as well – the impact of Chito and Neri’s sex scandal will fade once a new controversy erupts. The couple is now in the eye of the storm because no bigger showbiz issue has cropped up.
Until then, Chito and Neri should hold on, let the storm pass, and learn their lesson. They should remember that guarding their privacy at all costs could spare them a lot of sleepless nights and negative posts in theirs – and others’ – social media accounts.
It’s a costly lesson, but it’s something they can profit a lot from.
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